In Country Writing

Throughout the course of this week many lessons have been learned, emotions have been felt, relationships have been built and knowledge has been acquired.

Some takeaways:

Effect of community: Building a community is a powerful concept that can help a group of people create a common bond, develop support systems, and find a safe place for members to express their beliefs and share stories. By solidifying the relationships among this community, members can utilize assets and also compensate for the weaknesses or gaps that present themselves. We have seen community among our group and in the environment we have been exposed to. The relationships we have built in our group have allowed us to share emotions, break down barriers and seek out the potential for the group and overall trip. Although South Africa is still working toward building a community as a country, there are still smaller communities within that help people cope with this transition. It has been a challenge for me to connect and really experience the community in South Africa outside of our group. I don’t know if this is because we haven’t had the chance to explore this or if I have not been trying hard enough. I suppose the epitome of connecting with the community may be found in our experience in the township.  Here, we will further our understanding of community in the township as we experience the community through immersion instead of exposure. How do these community members interact together? What does being a community such as this mean to them? What emotions does it invoke? What resources amongst themselves do they utilize? Are they aware of the potential assets? What are their weaknesses?

Adaptive Leadership: One of the major discussions we have had is about adapting to the South African culture and accepting/appreciating it for what it is instead of comparing it to the American way. Dealing with the ambiguity of our schedule and environment here is essential to surviving in this culture. Letting go of expectations and simply “going with the flow” has been beneficial to me for this trip. I have had no disappointments and numerous celebrations such bonding amongst the group, quality of excursions and ability to reflect on the experiences. One thing that has aided in being adaptive in this experience is having lecture and reading the history of the country. I have caught myself numerous times comparing cultural practices to America and then find myself asking “Is this even relevant to our norms?” I feel that I am progressing and working toward my goal of avoiding such thinking from the American perspective and moving toward an opened minded, respectful, culturally humble one.  I am a strong believer in the phrase “You cannot know where you are going until you know where you have been.” Thus, learning the history is making it much easier to understand why South African is where it is today and helps move away from comparing it to American history. Without having that foundation of past history to build off of and know where strengths and weaknesses lie, how do you know which direction to go and what needs to be improved upon or what strengths need to be utilized?

Be Mindful: This particular concept entails a couple different things for me. First, it means simply slowing down. My natural American instinct is to accomplish what I am doing as quickly and efficiently as possible. However, in a place and experience such as this, I need to work on stepping back, standing on the balcony for some time and consciously being aware of what is happening around me – the sights, sounds, smells, emotions, activity and interaction. It is important to be mindful of how one is interacting in a different culture that they are not completely comfortable with. Second, it means letting myself be vulnerable. Up until this point, I have not fully let myself be vulnerable, let myself seek out the potential of my emotions and truly be myself. Vulnerability, to me, not only means those things but also means pushing boundaries, taking risks, moving out of my comfort zone, and going beyond what I think I am capable of. Although I have opened up and partially broken down barriers, it is a challenge for me to fully do so. I am aware of this weakness and am working toward resolving it, first by being aware of when I am doing it and then asking myself why I am holding back, what exactly I need to do in order to let myself become vulnerable and it is even appropriate in the situation. What I mean by this is that there is an appropriate time for being vulnerable and keeping composure. For example, while Nelson Mandela was on Robben Island, many times he did not express his fear for life to other as a way to help others cope with the situation. I feel strongly that our week in Gugulethu will help in the progress I make with this challenge.

Throughout all of those experiences and realizations so many emotions have been experienced – excited, happy, sad, enraged, uplifted, overwhelmed, pressured, and depressed. With a mix of all of these emotions cascading quickly, I feel choked up a lot of the time. It is difficult for me to cope and sort through these things and allow them to run their course. I am hoping my stay in the township will also give me an opportunity to seek out those emotions and analyze why exacting I am feeling the way that I do.